Which way round is a wired computer mouse?

Is the front of a computer mouse the arse of it due to the cable "tail" coming out of it, or is the front of a computer mouse the head of the mouse, as it is more of a correct shape?

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Simple the cable is not a tail.

Uh, I think you're kinda taking the name a bit too literally. Computer mice are just a tool used for controlling a computer.

I absolutely am, but they must have been named after regular mice, so idk what way it was originally envisaged.

The first computer mouse was apparently more of a block.
I imagine it got its name from the 'tail' part, and the fact that it now looks mouse-like is mostly a co-incidence of it now being more ergonomically shaped.

Could be both, to be honest. I've seen old mouses where the ears were on the buttons, and others where the tail is the cable

mouses

Mice.
But I know what you mean. Feels like computer mice should be its own word with its own plural form

Apparently mouses is correct for computer mice but I don't subscribe to that train of thought at all.

Yeah, it's been a while since I last used mice

Congrats you just discovered why restrictive, binary language isn’t a great way to describe real-world concepts.

Now do gender.

Whichever way allows your fingers to rest on the buttons. Unless it's a weird buttonless Apple mouse, then you're just SOL.

Neither, and both.

Many objects just don't have a front and a back, other than front being the side closer to you.

Just like you can sit behind and in front of the computer.

That was my risky click of the day