That's a clever curse, because if you're a good and thoughtful person you have nothing to worry about
Although if you struggle with mental health it may be.. a bit rough
For real!
I have autism, and I swear, dealing with other neurodivergant people is a true pain in the rear. It really puts it into perspective just how frustrating I probably am when my condition makes me into the world most dense and forgetful person in the room. I know I hate it when other people act the way I sometimes do subconsciously.
It's funny being neurodivergant and dealing with neurotypicals who really don't get it and then finding someone who is your exact brand of neurospicy and then watching them sit back in confusion as all of a sudden they are the odd one out.
"How about we verbalize our intentions?" "Pppft! You're the only one here who needs verbal cues. Try reading body language and not just assuming anything SUSAN."
but what şf I am eepy? Do I deal with sleepy people tjat can't sleep and I can't sleep either?
May your Tupperware and zip locks never fully close, click, snap or seal.
May mosquitos find your skin the rarest of delicacies while rendering others around you uninteresting to feed from.
May your front teeth be magnetic to food particles that are extra adhesive so you almost always have food stuck between your teeth.
May your tires always look deflated to others despite being full so you are constantly pointed at on the freeway and stoplights by other drivers.
May you compulsively jig any time you hear any music for a minimum for 30 seconds.
May you be unable to type so you are forced to handwrite everything. May you work for the IRS who accommodates your technological disability.
May people never find anything you say funny but they always give you halfhearted courtesy laughs.
May any TV channel or streaming station have no content other than Con Air on loop.
May you always get birthday cards, invitations and presents at least a month off from your real day.
May all your furniture squeak incessantly.
Every 24 hours, at noon, small rock appears in one of the shoes they are wearing.
They will grow a 5 inch translucent hair from the top of one ear every time they drink coffee.
15 minutes after they ride a bicycle they will have violent diarrhea with 5 minutes of warning signs.
Alcohol has no effect on them.
Every time they turn the steering wheel of their car further than 5°, their turn signal indicates the direction that the wheel turns.
They can hear what their dog or cat is thinking over any distance, but it is only a stream of consciousness because the animal is incapable of understanding that their thoughts are being heard.
Alcohol has no effect on them.
You're going to have to try again for this one.
- a teetotaler
May you step in dog shit every day and be oblivious until it's pointed out by someone else.
One that makes your sense of hearing lag behind your sense of sight by a second.
All of their drawers are missing the thing that keeps them from pulling all the way out so they end up yanking the drawer all the way out every time