My week was alright. Not much going on. I did notice I'm getting a lot more belly hairs. They're much darker than the rest of the hair on my whole body, which range from light blond to ginger. I wonder if the rest of my body hair will turn that dark. I quite like those little belly hairs.
I love comments like these because they are weirdly affirming for me as an MTF. My thought is always "WHY would you want that?!" 😂
I'm happy for you that you like it though 😅
Ikr? Even stubble feels better than full-blown yeti-ism. Finally hit my hands with an electric razor a little bit ago, think I might hit my forearms soon as well. All that'll be left after that is my back!
I am finding it's much easier to moisturize properly without hair getting in the way as well
Shame we can't just give it away to any FtM who wants it
Edit: finished up the arms, feeling complete and very soft 🫠
My week's been pretty good. I finally came out at work on Friday and it went really well. I did all the name/email change stuff, so it should be all changed over on Monday. I even got some compliments on my makeup and my new name.
My hair is getting longer but it is still in the awkward phase, my diet is kinda off-track but i'm starting to accept i'll probably never have a flat tummy, and I found my newest unrealistic transition goal! So all in all, an okay but not amazing week!
Got to see my mother interact with a trans individual while out shopping and running errands, and am reminded that she is a gem of a human being (complimented their nails and had a nice little chat), so that's a decent chunk of anxiety relieved about (eventually) coming out as trans.
Finished shaving the remainder of my body (minus back, that's proving tricky) and loving how smooth I feel and how much better lotion/moisturizer applies to my skin, feeling much softer. Def want to look into more permanent solutions (laser for thighs/legs, probably electrolysis for the bits) for my lower half. it just grows back too damn fast and the stubble stings a bit when I shower.
Realized the other day I had the perfect opportunity to try ditching the beard for a while and I missed it (mustache growing challenge thing), but not too concerned over it as I'm very used to it on my face at this point.
A rollercoaster. I went from thinking I would get HRT this week, to thinking I wouldn't get HRT for months to a year, to hoping I can get it within the next week while still worrying that I'll be fucked again by the healthcare system. It might be that even more of my problems are explained by being trans than I ever could have imagined.
It's honestly surreal how embedded this all is in my past. My romantic feelings, my physical health, my social problems with "other" boys, my mood, my parents, the toys I liked, my feelings of self hatred, what I named my fucking dog! Some of it might be misattribution, but many of these things are hard to deny. I really was always this way.
I thought my past didn't line up, that I wasn't a real girl, but the rabbit hole never seems to end. Nothing about coming out was a mistake except not doing it harder and sooner. I never could have imagined how amazing this has been. I'm finally alive 😊
Been a shit week tbh. Depression is kicking my ass (again), I still haven’t gotten a job after literal months of applying, I haven’t seen any of my friends in months, and I’m losing my health insurance soon. Feels like nothing in my life is going well right now 🫠
Hey bud, sorry you're having a shitty week. Things will get better in time, but you've just gotta wade through all the shit to get there. Things do have a way of working themselves out somehow. You'll figure out a better path when it comes along.
It really does help to visit friends, even if just for a little bit. If you can't visit in person hop on a discord call and play video games. Something's better than nothing, and being isolated can get addicting and easy to fall into. It's okay to ask for help too. Sometimes friends who are busy will make time for you if you reach out and explain that you're in a rough spot.
I hope next week will be better. Give yourself some grace in the meantime 💜
I took my 5th driver's test this morning, and fortunately I passed. I am so happy I can finally leave the countryside and go down to cities to try to get a job and friends!
Personally been all over the map. My mother's death anniversary was St. Patties day. Hit me extra hard this year as it's the first time grieving her loss as her daughter and on E.
Was a space cadet most of the day but feeling better now ❤️
I know how that feels. My dad died around this time of year too, though it's been a while. I spent last night crying about it for the first time in a long time. It's hard and there's no linear path for grieving, it just happens and you have to allow yourself to feel whatever it makes you feel. It'll never go away, but you'll get stronger and be able to carry that weight with less strain as time goes by. Grief is love and a billion other complicated emotions with no place to go anymore. Just remember not to be too hard on yourself and do the little things that make you feel better.
Grief is love and a billion other complicated emotions with no place to go anymore.
This. This hit hard. Just what I needed to hear about all of this. Thank you man! 😭❤️
