Hello, I work with numerous humans. Navigating their emotionality is quite haphazardous at times, and today I have seemingly transgressed on my colleague "Mike".
I have observed for numerous months that Mike appeared to be attempting a science experiment of sorts. It was a lacto-bacilli fermentation but I was unsure to what end. Mike had repurposed many parts of his meals and placed them into a sealed container to make something called "Kombucha". I am familiar with many fermented human foods, however I was unsure that Mike would achieve a favorable result. When asked why he didn't use the replicator for his "kombucha", he said it's not the same. I am still attempting to understand his logic as it quite literally would be the same.
Nevertheless, I have kept a careful eye on the fermentation, and as it's entered it's third month I noticed signs of bacterial and fungal contamination. Believing the dish to be clearly compromised, I safely discarded of it with the proper biohazard precautions. However, Mike is now irate, saying I ruined his lunch and that he likes it, "chunky but soft". I do not follow his logic. AIBI?
Edit: I see now I was being illogical. I should have thrown away both the "kombucha" and Mike.
Posting this here because I'm unsure of where else to post something like this.
Over two years ago at this point I mutually ended a nearly year long relationship with someone I was still in love with. We were graduating high school and while still going to colleges in the same city, realized we were in over our heads and were in an unhealthy situation so we split it off. It destroyed me. It took me a year to get my shit together (I went on a minor drug-binge for about 3 months after and spent probably $6k from eating out and making sure I always had enough bud) but I eventually met my current partner. Things aren't perfect in our relationship but I genuinely love her and we work to further strengthen our relationship. I don't know that I see the rest of my life with her, but we've been together over a year now and I don't have any intention of ending things anytime soon. We also live together so making it work is more of a necessity lol.
But I can't get my ex out of my head. I've spent nearly every day for the last two years trying to let go of her but I don't know why she keeps popping into my thoughts. I don't love her, I don't want to be with her, I don't want her in my life. And ahe isn't, but I'm still dealing with this. I do have a therapist who I've talked at length with about this but I don't know, something about her just is stuck in my head. Maybe I preferred sex with her? I doubt it but she did kinda define what I consider my "type", so maybe it's just she's more unromantically attractive to me? But it feels so much deeper than that. If it were those shallows reasons I feel like it would've been easier to debug and diagnose. She was my best friend. One day she was in my life, the next day not. It feels like a very specifically sized puzzle piece is missing and now there's a small hole in the puzzle.
I don't know, it's kinda maddening. I don't have most social media, so it's easier to avoid her online and not think about her. But occasionally I find myself borderline stalking her, except it's just me gathering random information I already know from OSINT tools with no intention or idea on how to utilize it (I'm well aware of how to use OSINT data, I mean in this specific situation). Part of it just feels like someone really important to me was rapidly removed from my life and I yearn to reconnect with them, but I guess I fear what such an endeavor might reawaken in me. I don't love her, at least I don't think I do. If I do it would be monumentally fucked up and I would feel like I'm emotionally cheating on my partner, who is somewhat aware of this issue but thinks I have it figured out (I thought I did too; I'm not knowingly lying to my partner). I don't know, I sent them a proper goodbye email a few months ago and thought that was that but it's clearly not. And I've put so much time and effort into trying to wrap it up for myself but now it feels like I'm just lost and stuck. Part of me just wants to reach out and ask if we can get a cup of coffee, but the other part of me recognizes the red flags in that immediately.
I just want to be done with this. I want my brain to get it through itself thar it's over. It's been over. There's no changing the past, and if I could, I don't think I would've reached the point where I am in life with my current opportunities if we had stayed together. Part of why we broke up was because as I was learning how to sell pot (which I was never very good at), I became a massive stoner (which I am very good at). She wasn't anti-weed but didn't appreciate it. When eventually saw that us growing apart was hurting each other and decided to leave things behind. Being young and dumb, I didn't handle the breakup well. I didn't do anything bad or harmful to her or anyone else, but it was obvious to both of us that I wasn't okay afterwards. When I feel like I needed her the most, she was gone from my life. In doing so she broke our promise of prioritizing our friendship over the relationship. I don't really know. I understand a lot of the reasons why I'm hurt and some are justified some are not. I understand the role I played and the responsibility I had in hoe things ended. I was not a great partner in a lot of instances, and neither was she. But part of me wonders if we had met now what it would be like. But I wouldn't have been who I am now without her and without being without her. I'm just so fucking unsure man.
I'm sorry if this is really rambly. I expect that the majority of answers will probably be to just get over it already, which I'm trying to do. I just don't feel like it's the right thing to ask to see her again, because that feels like an eventual mistake rather than closure. Idk, tell me I'm an idiot or an asshole to my current partner or something. I just want to be done with dealing with the legacy of a long-dead relationship.
TL;DR: Mutually ended a significant relationship when I wasn't ready. Been kinda fucked since. Want to not be fucked so I can be a better partner. I suck for this.
Edit: Thank you to everyone who has commented thus far. A lot of the discussion has been really helpful and I've got some new leads on how to debug this issue. I'm trying to respond to everyone and I can't express how appreciative I am.
https://lemmy.world/post/9845821
So I have two sites: my home network and my cloud VPSs. I have setup a FreeIPA domain that I would like to use for all my machines, local and remote. While I wait for Linode/Akamai to add their new VPC feature, I want to create Wireguard tunnels from each VPS to my home network with my UDMP as the router. I tried to set it up through the UI, however I can’t ping to/from the server wireguard interface when connected. So I tried to set it up with wg-quick but alas that isn’t working either. I have the firewall port for wireguard open with both Internet In and Internet Local. I’m not even trying to get LAN access yet because I can’t even ping over the tunnel. This has seriously frustrated me and I need to see if I’m just majorly fucking up or if I’m sane afterall and the UDMP just isn’t good for Wireguard. Server conf: [Interface] Address = 192.168.84.1/24 ListenPort = 51820 PrivateKey = [Peer] PublicKey = AllowedIps = 192.168.84.20/32 Client conf: [Interface] Address = 192.168.84.20/24 PrivateKey = [Peer] PublicKey = AllowedIPs = 192.168.84.1/32 I had PostUp and PostDown rules set, but they didn’t seem to make a difference. It seems they’re mostly for configuring routing with iptables. Can I please get a sanity check here?
I have an existing website that I use for all sorts of things. I was a bit more of a sucker when I bought the domain so I also bought a wildcard SSL cert for my domain instead of using LetsEncrypt. I use the home
subdomain to link back to my home network where I'm in the process of setting up a FreeIPA domain. In order to make sure the SSSD works properly, I read that I need to LDAPS, and for that I'll need some certs. I know FreeIPA generates its own certs, but these are self signed. I'd like to have my certs actually be trusted as theres a reason this is on an actual domain. However when i try to add my certs with
sudo ipa-cacert-manage -t 'C,,' CERT_BUNDLE
I get an issue with one of the certs (I know which one) for using an insecure algorithm. And (expectedly) I can't add the other certs as this is part of the CA chain. So I read to try renewing with the external-ca
option, and now I have a CSR from FreeIPA but I'm unsure if I can sign it with my SSL cert. Any guidance or help is vert much appreciated. I may have buggered my install in trying to figure this out, but I suppose we'll find out.
Update: It looks like I wasn't doing anything wrong; the root CA cert is SHA1 signed which seems to be my issue. I'm setting up everything with lets encrypt going forward and won't be buying a cert again unless i genuinely have a reason to.
Boost was my chosen Reddit client. I loved it and missed it when I had to move. I've since been using Thunder styled to exactly what my Boost config was, but I'm extremely glad to see Boost is back. There are a few things to get used to again, but I'm extremely happy to be here. Ruben, if you see this, could you make it so images can expand in the feed when clicked? Maybe it's because I'm using the dense view, but I do miss that bit. Otherwise, everything is fantastic! Thank you so much!
I'm a lemmon you're a lemmon we're all lemmons.
I want to preface this by saying this is my favorite Lemmy app and I'm extremely grateful to darklightxi for being such a 10x. These are just some things I'm sure many other people have said that I'm hoping to see in the future. I think the breakneck development speed is absolutely incredible as it is!
Thank you again to the developer! I really hope this post doesn't come off as ungrateful for the incredible work you're doing. I'll check out the GH and see if i have the ability to help with any of these.
@erev
@lemmy.world