I just got done watching Freaked. Man, what a boring fucking film. Basically, remember one of those Disney Channel original movies from the late ’90s or early ’00s, make it edgier, make it faster‐paced, and you’ll have a good idea of what to expect. A lot of the jokes might have been ingenious if I saw it in elementary school, but watching now they’re just generic, predictable, and easy.
Examples include a mad scientist imprisoning somebody in a gigantic outhouse, then telling himself that he ought to build a toilet in there; a memory echoing in somebody’s mind when it was really just somebody nearby repeating himself; a humanoid worm hissing at somebody; a werewolf chasing a squirrel; artificial Siamese twins acting like the Three Stooges; an adoring fan pestering somebody even after being sucked out of an aeroplane; and more.
I mean, I could understand why somebody would enjoy some of these jokes, but hoooooly shit, did they bore me. The only time that I either laughed or chuckled was when I riffed on the film, and I rarely did that. Credit where it’s due, though, some of the ideas are original (I’ve certainly never seen anthropomorphized eyeballs who work as Rastafarian police officers before), and it’s clear that the artists spent a lot of time on their crafts, so I can give them an A for effort. Nevertheless, none of that is enough for me to recommend the film.
Now, here’s a fun little challenge for you: this was a comedy from 1993. Can you guess what some of the jokes are about‽
That’s right! In one of the scenes, a character tells his audience that what they are about to show is not for those with intense sensibilities. The camera then cuts to two men in stereotypical ‘yuppie’ outfits getting up and walking out.
Now, your answer is correct, but it wasn’t the only thing that I had in mind. (Hint: it’s in the same neighborhood as your answer.)
Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding! Good answer! One of the characters is a trans woman, a non‐passing one at that, and that’s basically the entirety of the joke!
Oh yeah, I forgot the mention that the male protagonist and a female character kiss at the end of Freaked. Because, you know, it wouldn’t be a happy ending if we didn’t see any heterosexual activity between two individuals who barely fucking knew or liked each other.
:::
My favorite joke in the film was when the camera cut to a haystack next to nothing, and as we hear somebody falling out of an aeroplane, we wait in anticipation as he lands… next to the haystack. That is a perfect example of lazy comedy: when a joke is so predictable that you can literally flip a coin to vote on the only two possible outcomes. Awful. Don’t watch Freaked.