he lost me at "not like a primate".
I am a man of traditional values.
RETVRN TO MONKE
Humans are literally primates, so he's accidentally admitting the inhumanity of the bourgeoisie and aristocracy
The snobbery behind this convoluted banana ritual is as immense as it is ridiculous but on the other hand I'm kind of happy that there are guys like him telling the great unwashed masses about it. Seeing deranged behaviour like this makes the elite look utterly weird and unrelatable to normal people.
The only correct way to eat a banana is fitting as much of it into your mouth as possible while making intense eye contact with your nearest relative.