We know Bigfoots don't exist because if they did, capital would use them as free manual labor
That's it that's the post
Big feet aren't ideal for regimented factory or agricultural labor, and thus deemed to have no economic benefit & were slowly driven to extiction by habitat encroachment, with the 2020 California wildfires wiping out the last known flock.
donald trump is actually the last bigfoot, an endling of a species that formerly was fully integrated into the american bourgeoisie.
Reminds me of something I heard on a nature show I once watched:
The people of Borneo believe that orangutans can speak just as well as humans. They're just smart enough to shut up since they know that if they did, they would just be made to work.
(If this is even an actual story from Borneo it is probably more of a dark joke about forced labour under colonialism than an actual belief)
Just watched Sasquatch Sunset with my partner and we were talking about whether or not they could be real, and i came up with this banger of a point and had to share with my friends
So many bigs foot in that photo. But what's that tall, brown fuzzy thing in the background?
One of the biggest threats to gorillas today is people hunting them for "bushmeat" because people will pay top dollar to eat them.
There's no way that all these "Hunter sees bigfoot but doesn't shoot" stories are true, if bigfoot were real, there'd be a huge industry devoted to hunting them to extinction so the rich and powerful can eat them.
I remember hearing about how some monkies were trained to pick coconuts. The liberals got mad and then the farm switched to hired farm hands and underpaid them.
I assume you meant "Monkey" there, not "monied" but that works just as well for lib outrage. Of course they'd be mad about the rich actually working.
Coconut harvesting is so exploitative that we've got multiple ape species suffering as a result lol
There is only one bigfoot and he is an eternal spirit of the woods. He will appear to us when we have proven ourselves as friends to all of nature.
And that, my friends, is how I proved the moon doesn't exist.
(checks notes)
Oh, apparently making people work under moonlight is a thing... My bad, the moon does exist after all.