What's the most you ever lost in an election? You need to call it. I can't call it for you. It wouldn't be fair. It wouldn't even be right. You've been putting it up a coconut tree your entire life, you just didn't know it. You stand to win everything, unburdened by what has been. Do not come in your pocket. Otherwise it will become just another election. Which it is.
This kind of shitpost is why I fucking love you all.
I just got an invasive thought. I must now make up lyrics to Alanis Morissette's Ironic but instead of "it figures" it's "it Chigurhs"
An old man tried to play it straight
He found 2 million dollars and died the next day
It's a burning rag in your Chevrolet
And Carla Jean arrives two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic
Don't you think?
It's like retiring because you're solving the case
It's a free ride when the cops blown away
It's the coin toss that you just didn't take
Who would have thought
It's Chigurh
