I think the legendary difficulty is a myth overshadowing these games. Some things the “git gud” crowd doesn’t talk about:
For PvE being a mage is going to get you far as a beginner. The ability to put distance between yourself and enemies by flinging spells is incredibly powerful even when doing chip damage.
Figure out how to summon help. It works a little different in each game, but having another player to distract enemies while you hit them in the back makes hard parts trivial. This especially goes for most bosses.
When you get to a new area scout it out by placing a summoning sign. There is no punishment for dying if you were summoned as a helper. You keep souls earned too, but cant collect items or progress your own world.
Alternatively, scout areas by invading. You will drop souls if you die doing this, but the enemies wont attack you, so it’s easy to run around everywhere and see where they all hide or patrol.
I think the newer games are easier too - for me Elden Ring was the easiest for a bunch of reasons. There are a lot of purposefully easy dungeons. If you get stuck there’s always a different place to go because it’s open world. You can summon NPC helpers instead of other players for a bit of mana, and some of them can be cheesy. Summoning items needed for players are extremely plentiful. Most of the hardest bosses are completely optional. If all else fails its very easy to over level. Being a mage is significant overpowered in this one (to the point that I think it ruins the fun, but if it lets you experience a great game I say go for it).