I think it also has a lot to do with the influence of patiarchy and toxic masculinity on the grieving person.
If you managed to push back against some of society's expectations on men, know how to express more emotions than "angry" and "horny" and have shown vulnerability in the past, people will find it much easier to approach you.
On the other hand, if someone is working super hard to keep up their "manliness", you may realize that they're struggling, but you'll have reservations about tearing down the crumbling facade they're desparately trying to preserve.
