My daughter's public school in Indiana is having "Hawaiian Day" today. That's offensive, isn't it?

I dropped her off this morning and saw girls (and boys) wearing grass skirts, some of them with coconut bras too. I'm not sure what else is going on, but it doesn't seem very respectful of a native culture that we have seriously fucked over. Would they have a "Native American Day" and let kids come in wearing feathered headdresses?

Or am I reading too much into it?

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Are you asking how engaging in stereotype is disrespectful?

If it has nothing to do with Hawaiian culture then it's not a stereotype. Were you mistaken about it not being associated with Hawaiian culture?

What do you think a stereotype is..?

A widely held but fixed and oversimplified image or idea of a particular type of person or thing.

For example, coconut bras and grass skirts?

You're missing the point. You can't both claim that grass skirts and coconut bras have nothing to do with Hawaiian culture, then immediately say its offensive to Hawaiian culture, because if they had nothing to do with Hawaiian culture, how can it be offensive to them?

You're statement that it has nothing to do with Hawaiian culture was the issue here.

I'm hardly missing your point, I just think it's ridiculous. Purporting that something is associated with another culture, even if untrue, can certainly be offensive. It's like watermelon and fried chicken for Black people. Would you claim that is inoffensive?

... because they're associated with Hawaiian culture?

'Associated with [by outsiders]' is a wholly different animal than 'part of [according to members]'. That's literally the point of the conversation we're having.

The logical follow-up question is, "who made you the arbiter of Hawaiian culture?" I propose that coconuts and grass skirts are very much associated with Hawaiian culture today. Just like tikka masala is associated with Indian culture, even though it was invented by a Brit, and tempura is associated with Japanese culture, even though it was invented by the Portuguese.

There isn't an authority on what is and is not associated with one's culture. That's highly subjective, and changes much over time. Eventually cultures adopt and relinquish all kinds of values, practises, and customs. It can happen intentionally, but usually it's quite by accident.

There's a very simple answer to your question that it seems like you're almost deliberately avoiding: native Hawaiians.