I've tried seeking help several times. Doctors haven't been particularly helpful (some have just fobbed me off) and the most I got were a few art therapy sessions with a charity a few years back.
Last year after my last breakup I self-referred to the NHS with depression and the most I got was an online cognitive behavioral therapy course that I really could have studied from a book. There was a years-long waiting list before COVID and now things are somehow even worse.
Even trying to go private has been a no-go because every therapist in my city is overbooked.
Fortunately I have private health insurance from my workplace, so I may be able to get therapy through that.
there is a lot of (deserved) hurt and anger that needs to be addressed.
In what respect? It seems worded in a way that implies I deserve what I get, and that is something I really don't understand.
Deserved as in your deservedly feel hurt or angry about the things in the past. As in, shitty things happened to you, so you (rightfully) feel the way you do. You deserve to feel that way in the sense you rightfully feel that way. It doesn't mean you deserved to have those things happen to you. Different usages of the word.
Other commentor was correct, but “deserved” in that you’re right to feel that way. Not that you deserved any mistreatment.
As for finding someone, I’m in the US, but it sucks here too taking to virtually everyone I know who’s looked for help. If they’re booking three months out, schedule it and you can always cancel if you something more immediate. But you gotta be persistent, since no one is going to ever be a bigger advocate for you than you. Also might need to try more than one therapist to find someone who clicks.