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Police Talk Man Down From Edge Of Climaxing
https://www.theonion.com/police-talk-man-down-from-edge-of-climaxing-1850818648
CLEVELAND—Rushing into action mere moments before the situation reached a point of no return, heroic police officer Samuel Esposito reportedly talked a man down Tuesday from the edge of climaxing. “Sir, before you do something drastic that we all regret, I’m asking you put down your penis and step away from the…