Why are dried pickles not a thing

In case serious. Before refrigeration and Air conditioning were invented, farmers wanted to keep their produce from going bad.

You had a few options, canning, bottling, pickling, salting, drying. Canning was invented 250 years ago or so. Bottling was a thing as long as bottles have been around, which is 500 or so years ago. Beyond that, the best way to ensure food doesn't grow bacteria or mold or whatever on it is to make the food inhospitable to microbial life, so by depriving it of water or putting something in it that prevents growth. So vinegar and salt.

That's why pickles are a thing. We now live in an age where food "just comes from the grocery or food kiosk or restaurant". Mostly due to improvements in technology. But food usually comes in seasons. Whether hunting, fishing or planting. Fruit cocktail canning is done over the course of a month in a year. 24 hours nonstop.

Cucumbers grow easily. Preserving them turns them into pickles.

I gotta preserve my cucumbers somehow!